Pride of [BAND’S HOMETOWN], [BAND NAME] have just released their [NUMBER] album. After [NUMBER] years in the making and with [RELEVANT NEWS], it’s finally here! Featuring tracks such as [SINGLE NAME] and [LESS POPULAR SINGLE NAME], [ALBUM] is on everybody’s lips in the [RELEVANT GENRE] scene.
Confused? Here, let me explain. Like clockwork, every autumn since 2006, Electric Six have released another album, and every winter since 2008 Electric Six have toured the UK. However, they haven’t had a chart topping single or album since the release of their debut album ‘Fire’ back in 2003, which featured ‘Gay Bar’ and ‘Danger! High Voltage’.
For the last five albums, Electric Six have just been phoning it in, recycling old song structures and refusing to show a shred of originality or progression. 11 years is a rather long time to be coasting on a past success, so if you’re not going to even try to be original, then neither am I. As such, here’s a generic review for the most generic of albums.
[ALBUM] is as [ADJECTIVE] as [MOST SUCCESSFUL ALBUM]. [ANY SONG NAME] really [VERBS] you as if you were [ATTEMPT WITTY CULTURAL REFERENCE]. Sounding like [SEARCH RELEVANT ARTIST SECTION ON BANDS LAST.FM PAGE], [ALBUM] is a cross between [RELEVANT BAND A] and [RELEVANT BAND B] with just a little hint of [RELEVANT BAND C].
All aspects of [ALBUM] are [POSITIVE ADJECTIVE]. [LEAD SINGER] has really [VERB] with this album, unlike [PAST ALBUM]. [GUITARIST(s) NAME] also throw their signature sound into the mix, creating a [LESS POSITIVE ADJECTIVE] noise on [ALBUM]. However, with tracks like [ANY SONG THAT IS NOT A SINGLE], there are times where [INSERT CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISCM TO AVOID BUTT-KISSING].
All in all, [ALBUM] is [ADJECTIVE], [SYNONYM OF ADJECTIVE] and above all [MOST IMPRESSIVE SYNONYM OF ADJECTIVE]. [ALBUM] certain holds its own in [BAND NAMES] discography, and is definitely better than [ALBUM WHERE BAND TRIED SOMETHING NEW]. Either way, [BAND NAME] will be touring [COUNTRY] soon, so be sure to check them out when they do.
Written by Andy Roberts (@Sassensquatch)
Founder & Editor for DEAD PRESS!