EP: Pints – Drink, Smoke, Gamble, Repeat
July 11th, 2014
Release Date: July 11th, 2014
Website: None available
Twitter: None available
‘Drink, Smoke, Gamble, Repeat’ opens with an expletive-riddled rant from ex-Leyton Orient FC manager John Sitton, saying some rather confrontational things to the “Bertie Big Bollocks” in his team on a half-time break. There’s cockney metaphors, enough “fuck”s for the whole dugout and a couple of “cunt”s thrown in for good measure. If you’re a London mob called Pints who sing about, surprisingly enough, getting pissed up, smoking fags and generally telling people to fuck off, this is probably the best way to establish the tone.
Pints set themselves up as a band to hate. On appearance, from the loutish name and lad-baiting track names (‘Jog On’, ‘Holstenz’), they paint themselves into a particularly unpleasant corner that most will likely cross the street to avoid, much like the proverbial blind-drunk group of bastards Pints sound like. But, those who take the time to peer through the scum will be treated to old school UKHC at its dumbest, catchiest and scuzziest.
Over 5 songs and a running time that doesn’t touch the 10-minute mark, Pints will spend 90% of this time shouting about going down the pub or the bookies and getting drunk, briefly taking a break from the subject to tell any fringes in the crowd to “Jog on, you stupid fucking emo twats”. There’s a chance that this is all a subversive look at the state of a disillusioned generation and, if so, this is some seriously well-disguised social commentary.
Of course, it’s not, and that doesn’t matter. The riffs are raw, the rhythms are relentless, and the lyrics, for a band who proudly admit to gratuitous levels of lager consumption, are coherent and catchy. Each track has a shining moment, none more so than the title-track, starting as yet another piss-up anthem before descending into gleeful self-deprecation in the repeated mantra “No one fucking likes me when I’m drunk / No one fucking likes me, I’m a cunt”. So dumb, it’s kind of genius.
Written by Grant Bailey